Sacred Fool Vessel

On my Etsy site I've described this piece as having the possibility of holding Faith, Innocence, and the Letting Go of Fear. 

I made this several years ago. I love having it in my life. The Fool has always been sacred to me.

Potato Dream

Last night I dreamed that my potatoes had sprouted and voila, today I went and checked and there they were in their complete adorableness peeking through the straw mulch soakin' up a little of the warmth today.How cool is that??? 

In my dream the sprouts were much bigger, dense. Also, I found them while I was exploring really deep parts of the ocean in my pajamas. I don't even wear pajamas. The wonderful thing about being underwater in dreams is that I can breathe. There are bubbles. And the bubbles cover my eyes so I can see. The potato babies were not in the ocean. Not really sure how I got to the earthy part of the dream but I digress.

I don't eat potatoes, although, I'm hearing about this thing called "resistant starch". Raw potato is one of them and what it does is feed the healthy bacteria in the gut with huge amounts of health benefits. Another dot connected in my seemingly unrelated and artistic life of dotness. This connecting is a thing I adore because it creates more amazement and I think I kinda live for that. Hmmm, and possibly I live to digress. Amen.

P.S. This photo is not my actual baby potato but one on google images that is the exact twin of my new tater tot. Thank you google images, once again.

Connection

A clay board drawing I must have done 1-2 hundred years ago. Something about being separate and connected from within and by everything that surrounds us because we are all of it and each other.

Six Month Emotive

"Things take the time they take." - Mary Oliver

Last couple of days there's been a recurring sadness. A pervasive tear drenched sadness.  6 months of silence from someone that professed to love me has created a deep mere of ruin that I fall into sometimes as I journey over the bridge. A bridge I continue to build to save my heart and my life. Three years of joys, hardships, trust, and growth inspiring work, then nothing. Now I am left with some kind of healed over wound that feels like a bruise to the touch. Some days I worry about my ability to repair the damage.

Maybe, trying to find some lightness, maybe just because it feels good, I move around in the world as freely and as joyously as I can. It doesn't seem to matter. Randomly, it appears, pokes, writhes, swells. I'm trying to write about it so that it can just be. Words are hard. Pain is not easy to describe.

And then I get angry at myself for letting it happen again. For not just being able to get past the grief. For not just despising. For turning my head in the direction of anguish. For not focusing in the direction of the beauty that still exists in the world. For imagining that she has the power to hurt me with her self absorbed choices, denials, and reasons. For being angry at myself for being human.

It could be that anger is just easier, somehow kinder than grief but still, a disingenuous substitute. Of course there is always time. That ancient, annoying, trustworthy cliche. Time will you wash me clean of this soiled memory? Will you leave only the moments that move from one to the other, always with perfection?

                   Small Prayer
                   by Weldon Kees

                  Change, move, dead clock, that this fresh day
                  May break with dazzling light to these sick eyes.
                  Burn, glare, old sun, so long unseen,
                  That time may find its sound again, and cleanse
                  Whatever it is that a wound remembers
                  After the healing ends.

Bee Blur

Passed by the Ceanothus "hedge" again, on my way to Shiga, and there was so much going on!!  Bees galore and I wanted to take a beautiful picture of them and they buzzed too fast and it was raining and I'm allergic and I was laughing. So it was difficult. I'll try again.

Positive Affirmation

Story People

Another Find

Hot Plate Woman Self Portrait

Found her on a blog and am always inspired by her art and words. Wonderful wonderful writer. Betsy.

Haha Kitties

Story People

Simpleness

Today was a workday. I made some money doing things that bring a fair amount of satisfaction and some joy. Listening to people's stories about their bodies and their hearts, stories about their every days and their unusual days. I imagine that being a bartender has some similarities but in my case there is no obvious altered states except those induced by the stories themselves.

After work I came home to my quiet cave and made myself some dinner. One of my favorite paleo like recipes of a lamb smothered in spinach that steams into yumness. Just a simple salt and pepper spicing.

I began to think about the rain that fell today and opened the door and decided to walk to the Shiga Gardens and check the plot. The sky was darkening and gorgeous and I felt a sweetness. Walking past this ample hedge of ceanothus was transporting. The air was tropically thick and the scent of purple intoxicating.

In the garden the straw mulch was humid. Reaching my fingers into the straw covering the potatoes made me smile with the sensualness of it. I truly love my garden and the earth.

What a beautiful day. There never has been or ever will be one like it. I am gratitude.

Today's Story

I'm getting Story People in my inbox daily so I thought I'd keep sharing them here. Just too much to enjoy for my one Self.

Another Favorite

Brian Andreas does these amazing drawings with wonderful stories to them. His website is Story People and if you need to send someone a creative, thoughtful, brilliant card check out the site.

More On Ants

Barney and Malcolm have gone, apparently. I'm sad about it but I know they have their own path, very literally. Still, I did find out more about ants and it's pretty wonderful.

It seems that B & M may have been part of a small colony that lives in natural cavities. I guess a little crack in the caulk of a bathtub can be considered natural. They evolved from waspy creatures a long long time ago (120-130 million years ago)  and now there are like 22,000 species. I'll never really know which ones chose to live with me for awhile but I feel blessed. 

Socially, we could learn a lot from them. Check this quote out from wikipedia,  "Ants have colonised almost every landmass on Earth. The only places lacking indigenous ants are Antarctica and a few remote or inhospitable islands. Ants thrive in most ecosystems and may form 15–25% of the terrestrial animal biomass.^[6] Their success in so many environments has been attributed to their social organisation and their ability to modify habitats, tap resources, and defend themselves. Their long co-evolution with other species has led to mimetic, commensal, parasitic, and mutualistic relationships". 

And if you click on those links it's even more fun.

Mulch

Everything is looking so luscious. I've been learning new things from the gardeners at Shiga. In my tubs I had to pull the chard and spinach because they bolted but now there are zinnias and lobelia and some black eyed susan. The sweet peas are about to bud and the garlics are happy happy.

The Cure

I'm just sayin'. I was at Death's Door and the night before the End I made myself a concoction that saved me. A hot toddy made with cinnamon whiskey, Gypsy Cold Care tea, slices of ginger, fresh lemon juice, and raw honey. A miracle in the disguise of an alcoholics nightmare.

The photo is my rendition of the ingredients. (thank you Photoshop and Google Images )  They look innocent and harmless but they are powerful beyond appearances!

Everywoman Art

Another of my favorite artists on Etsy, Jeanie Tomanek. I love the light, the concept, the texture. Her shop is Everywoman Art.

Everywoman Art Link

On a Summer's Day

This piece had been sitting on my studio table for several days... unfinished. I was haunted. Today it's finished and now I can go back to my bed and help heal this cold that's found it's way into my body. I might have stayed in bed longer but they are remodeling, AGAIN, upstairs and there was no sleeping. I love to sleep through illness. My body loves me for it.

Blah

It finally got me. Crept up on me in the night and became a full blown (no pun intended) cold by noon today. I feel like pestilence. I know I'm contagious and for sure I'm pathetic. "This too shall pass" does not help.

Happy Mother's Day

I wrote a song for him when I was 15. I had this guitar with only 5 strings. Didn't have the money to buy one after it broke. Sometimes you just do with what ya have.

When he finally came into the world I was 40. I tried for years to have him begin in my belly but it was not to be. I will always be beyond grateful to his other mom for her love and fertility.

This year he brought up Mother's Day and made the plans with both of us. I really, really like this man. I think I'll make a day called Children's Day and celebrate it with him soon.

"Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself."
                                                                                  The Prophet
                                                                                   Kahlil Gibran

Iceland Home

Icelandic people have been living in turf homes for a long time. They still exist but many of them have been moved to museums or are being used as farm storage. I bet turf roofs would work in the Northwest.

And to my friends that might worry, I promise I won't move to Iceland.

Oops

There is a first time for everything, apparently. Yesterday I sent the wrong piece to a customer. She bought 2 and I sent them out right away. Maybe too right away?

Customer service is the foundation of business, in my not so humble opinion. So I'm telling her to keep the mistaken one and I will send her the one she ordered.

Sometimes it's so mortifying to be human.

A Promise is a Promise

And I promised my studio that I would be there soon and so that has come to pass. Here is the latest of the re-fused blown glass firing. I love this one!